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Contents:

1)  What's March Hangman

2)  Why is it called MARCH Hangman?

3)  How do I play?

4)  Who's Colin Gagnon Software?

5)  Registering

6)  Hey, Vendor Boy!



1)  What's March Hangman?

  March Hangman is my new hangman game, with a twist (not a very good one,
though).  It doesn't use REAL words, instead, there are words that my friends
and aquaintences have made up, such as Yuckers, Splooge, and Nifkin, and some
that are just randomly generated by the game.  In short, it's not easy.  But
it's fun (sorta), it's small, it was only a short download, and it's cheap,
which is why you should register.


2)  Why is it called MARCH Hangman?

  Well, I felt that it should have a better name than just Hangman, so I
grabbed the dictionary, closed my eyes, and picked a random word.  It was
"Slither."  Well, that didn't sound very good, so I did it again.  This time,
the word was "Uvula."  And again, the word was "Anus" (it really was.  I know
it's a nice, safe, medical word, but just how wise is it to release a game 
called "Anus Hangman?").  So I tried it again, and came up with "March."  
It was more or less fitting, because I wrote it in March.  Hence the name.


3)  How do I play?

  First, type HANGMAN or run it from Windows.  Now wait for the Colin Gagnon
Software screen to come up, and then for the title screen.  Press a key.
Now, guess a letter.  If you're wrong, you'll be alerted by a sound and a 
picture.  Get 5 wrong, and "Yer Dead."  Understand?  Moron.

  Yes, I know it's hard, but don't worry.  After awhile, it'll come much
easier (and the game will be easier to play, too).  All you hafta do is learn
the secret (memorize all the words).


4)  Who are we?

  Colin Gagnon Software started in late 1995, after Computron Information 
Systems, another "leading" shareware company decided they didn't like Colin 
very much anymore.  (Actually, I pulled out because I didn't want to write 
poorly designed business software. "Saddened" by this, Colin decided to go out 
on the open road.  Pioneer his own company.  Come into manhood.  Get on with 
the story.  Colin wrote Horrorscopes, in hopes that perhaps one day he could 
be a syndicated columnist:

Gemini:  In an attempt to find those Field and Stream magazines you were 
hiding under your bed, your parents find your custom made Richard Nixon Pez 
dispenser.  You'll have some quick explaining to do, and you'd better, or 
else your parents will make you...

  Well, he didn't become the horoscope columnist after all, but he DID go on 
to write Cheater, the most valuable thing to Computer Gaming since the 
linoleum cat.  On a more serious tone, Colin has lately been experiencing 
bellybutton lint trouble, and needs you to register this program so that he
can continue his treatment, and help prolong the life of his only friend, an
unborn parakeet named Jimmy.

  And there's a lot of other dumb stuff too, like The Gagnon Utilities, and
Groan, and Arkenstone....

So that's what this is about, Mister Green Jeans.  It's all here.

* You may have noticed that I refer to Colin Gagnon Software as "we," while at
  the time of writing this file, there is only one person involved. Well, he's
  schizophrenic.


5)  Registering

  Well, if you OWN a copy of this program, then you must know what SHAREWARE
is, RIGHT?  WRONG???!!!???!!!  Oh.  Well, this is the only section of the
documentation that won't insult your "intelligence" (yeah, I know).

  Shareware is a really neat-o keen type of software, by golly!  It's 
distributed for free (give it to yer friends! Legally!), but if you like it, 
you have to send the author (that's me!) $$money$$!  That is called 
"REGISTERING."  Can you say "REGISTER?"  Sure. I knew you could.  So, boys 
and girls, what happens when you register?  Well, first of all, I GET YOUR 
NAME AND ADDRESS!!!  HAHAHAHAHA.....oops.  I mean, when you register, you are 
first telling the author (that's me!) that you liked the program, and that 
you're looking foreward to any others he/she/it will release in the future.  
Second, the author (once again, that's me!) may send you something, such as 
a newer version of the program, a registered version of the program, more of 
his/her/its software, or nothing at all.  In this case, we'll send you some 
more of our stuff (yay!).

  To register, just send $10 in check (preferred) or cash only, please to:

                        March Hangman Registration
                        Colin Gagnon Software
                        408 Pine St.
                        Stoughton, WI 53589

  Please wait _ to _____ weeks for delivery (leaning closer to _).  Also, if
you don't want me to write anymore programs, please register.  If you just
send me a letter that says "Dear Mr. Gagnon, You're a schmuck.  I'm gonna bite
your nose off in you keep writing these stoopid programs..." (notice that he
spells that word like I do. Who's side is this guy on?), I'll just disregard
it.  BUT!  If you PAY me to stop, I might consider sending back a nice "Forget
You" note.

  Like I said above, I prefer checks or cash.  If you try to pay with a credit
card, I'll throw away yer order (credit card number, too, really, I mean it),
and I probably won't even politely notify you (if I notify you at all).  I've
explained my stance on credit cards, I don't think it needs any more emphasis.


6)  Hey, Vendor Boy!

Oh goody!  You decided to sell my program!  BUT!!!  These are the terms to
which you must abide in order to do so:

1)  Clearly mark the package as "Shareware" or "Try before you buy" software.
    You must explain the concept on the packaging.

2)  State that the program is a product of Colin Gagnon Software on the
    packaging or in the catalog.

3)  Inform me in writing.

4)  Distribute only the most recent version of the program.  To obtain a copy,
    you should register.

5)  Distribute all the files.  If all the files are not in your copy, or you
    are unsure, you should register.  You will recieve a complete copy.

6)  If a price is to be charged for the program, it shall not exceed $9 U.S.,
    which is pretty darned expensive, anyway.

7)  Distribute all the files.  If all the files are not in your copy, or you
    are unsure, you should register.  The files are:
        
        README.TXT
        HANGMAN.EXE
        HEAD.CGS
        TORSO.CGS
        LEGS.CGS
        DEAD.CGS
        GALLOWS.CGS
        CGS.CGS
        TITLE.CGS

8)  You will not hold Colin Gagnon Software or it's partners responsible from
    any damage or inconvenience resulting from your failure to abide by these
    terms.

All of these terms must be met.  Action may be taken against anyone who fails
to abide by them.
